Got to give
Tonight, I have coffee, Norah Jones, and a shirt that smells of what I’m to forget. Embracing pain, loneliness, and, the always character defining, self-loathing is not what I want. But it is what I’ve got. And it is what it is until it is something else. I read in Hebrews 12 that we can understand hardships as God disciplining us; that God disciplines the ones he loves. I’m not sure if that is a better perspective than “people make stupid decisions and leave others wondering how to pick up all the pieces.” But, one portion of Chapter 12 is;
10Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. 11No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
Hopeful, but I only wonder if we are given things to only have them taken. A possibility? How do we know what we are given won’t be taken? And what “harvest of righteousness and peace” will come? Is peace just numbing to pain? I don’t know. I can trust something will come. Something has got to give. And I say that with the utmost pleading in my voice. Something has got to give.
